


Marionette

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: Reaper76 [19]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Betrayal, Blackmail, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Broken Promises, Character Death, Choices, Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Heavy Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Loss of Trust, Love, Lovers To Enemies, M/M, Marriage, Missions Gone Wrong, Promises, Self-Hatred, Torture, Trust Issues, Undercover Missions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-01
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-08-20 06:48:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16550945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: Gabriel Reyes had seen Zurich go up in flames around him, he'd even seen the culprit who set the bomb, the man that had destroyed everything. But Why? Why had it happened? His search for the truth throws up new evidence, and a dawning realisation that he had been blind to what was truly happening sends him search of the one person who might tell him the truth.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> “Because to take away a man's freedom of choice, even his freedom to make the wrong choice, is to manipulate him as though he were a puppet and not a person.” 
> 
> ― Madeleine L'Engle

SEP.

Soldier Enhancement Program.

   Jack Morrison hadn’t thought twice about it when he had been recruited to the program, even the lack of details and the fact that he would be isolated from the world, from his family for months on end hadn’t made him hesitate. It was a chance to get stronger. A chance to fight, to protect - to make a difference. He knew that many people viewed his goals as naïve and idealistic. They were. He had seen that for himself out in the field, it was impossible to fight and not realise just how difficult it was too achieve goals like that. He’d lost enough men, enough civilians, enough parts of himself to know better, and yet he still clung to those lofty goals and signed all the paperwork without hesitation. _This will help. I will be able to help_. It was enough to quell the quiet doubts that simmered in the back of his mind despite is determination, enough to quiet the fear that lurked beneath the surface, kept at bay by an easy smile and an even easier manner as he embarked on what at the time seemed like would be the hardest months of his life.

    There had been times he had regretted his decision when he had questioned his sanity when he realised just how much they hadn’t been warned about. Hell, he had doubted it more times than he could count, usually when his body was turning itself inside out to accommodate the changes being forced on it by the serum. During long nights spent curled in the pitiful square box that served as the bathroom, his stomach churning as it tried to empty out stuff that wasn’t there, bile flooding his mouth. During even longer nights spent trapped in the covers, tossing and turning as it felt like a fire was working its way through his veins. Endless days when he had lain on his back, unable to move, barely able to breathe, just staring at the ceiling and waiting for it all to end. Praying for it to end. Wishing that he could die just to make it all stop.

It hadn’t ended. It hadn’t got easier, and he didn’t die. _Maybe it would have been better if he had…_

   Instead, he had met Gabe. He had always been aware of Gabriel Reyes on some level, it was hard not to be, he was one of the oldest recruits in the program and one of the most decorated. They had fought together once before, a joint mission that had nearly ended in disaster, and they had clashed more than once during that time. Reyes wasn’t one for ‘naïve, idealistic farm boys’ as he had put it, and Jack hadn’t liked his more cynical nature, but he had respected him, and at the end of the mission they had parted civilly if not on friendly terms. There was no room for those kinds of tensions in SEP though. Not least because they all lacked the energy for it, the weekly treatments and subsequent adjustment period, filled with training, doctors’ appointments and psych evaluations left little time or willpower to do anything else. What little time they did have was better spent on friendly terms, on bolstering one another’s flagging spirits and failing bodies and as their numbers had dwindled, they had paired off, and somehow Jack had found himself paired with Gabe.

   It hadn’t been easy, the tensions and differences in their personalities hadn’t just faded overnight or with the exhaustion that plagued their every waking moment and more than once they had found themselves working it off during their training…friendly competition was actively encouraged, but with the nature of the program their trainers would look the other way if things got a little too heated every now and then, although there were limits to what would be accepted

and one of the others had ended up in isolation for a week because they’d gone too far. Jack had wound up with more than one black eye, and even a bust lip on occasion because Gabe wasn’t one for holding back, but he always gave as good as he got and when they were finished, the tension was always gone, and they would be laughing and joking, casual teasing depending on who had won or lost. In the never-ending hell, that was their treatments it was something real for them to cling to.

   As the training got harder, adapted to meet their changing bodies and as the reactions to the serums got worse and worse, more and more of their cohort disappearing into the infirmary never to be seen again, Jack found that his friendship with Gabe was the only thing that kept him going. He stilled looked forward to the rare letters from home, the few care packages that were allowed through security, but as the days stretched on he found that he’d rather spend time listening to the older man rambling on about life in L.A. The world painted by that honeyed voice, tales of a city that Jack wouldn’t mind seeing one day especially with Gabe, although he kept that thought to himself; of childish exploits from a life surrounded with siblings, and a mother that summoned fond memories of his Grandmother felt more real to him than the distant life he had left behind in Indiana. Although on the occasions that he would talk about home, about long days in the fields, getting chased by a bull after a dare from an older cousin, and the burden of being the oldest son, but not wanting to inherit the family business, there was always an answering gleam of interest in the dark eyes.

   It had been Gabe who had found him the morning that he had thought that his body was about to fail him, breaking into his room when he hadn’t shown up at breakfast, to find him lying on the floor, vomit inches from his face. Gabe who hadn’t hesitated to lift him from the ground, the hands which could be so lethal during training incredibly gentle as he bore Jack to the bed, voice soft and soothing when Jack had pleaded with him to let it end. To make it stop. There had been no disappointment or disgust in the fleeting memories Jack had of those long hours, Gabe hadn’t judged him for his weakness and had stayed with him as much as possible, calmly cleaning up the mess, wiping a cool cloth across his forehead as his temperature soared. And it had been that soft voice in his ear, painting pictures of a world beyond SEP - images of a life beyond the feeling of his body shifting and changing with each breath that had slowly drawn him back from the edge.

   The room had been dark aside from the bathroom light when he had clawed his way back to full awareness, but he could still feel Gabe pressed against his side, fingers carding through his hair and his voice rasping in a way that suggested he had been talking for a long time. Jack had lacked the strength to speak, feeling as though the gentlest of breezes could topple him right now. Instead, he had made a quiet noise and turned his head just enough to nudge at Gabe’s chest. They had both frozen for a moment, Jack startled to realise that he was practically being cradled against the other man and Gabe startled by his return to consciousness, and for a terrifying moment Jack thought that he was going to be pushed away, unable to stop the soft keen that slipped out at the mere thought, his fingers curling weakly in the material of Gabe’s t-shirt. It wouldn’t be enough to stop him, but it was all Jack had at the moment, and he felt the jolt that greeted his touch and closed his eyes. _I screwed up…_

“Jack.” Even the soft tone wasn’t enough to make him open his eyes, and he flinched at the sigh that followed, only to be caught by surprise as Gabe’s arms crept around him in what was unmistakably a hug and he opened his eyes, peeking up at Gabe, barely able to make out the small smile on his face in the weak light coming from the bathroom. His voice still wouldn’t obey his commands, so he tightened his hold on Gabe’s shirt as best he could and hoped that it would be enough, and from the way, Gabe relaxed against him it must’ve been. “You scared me.” If they hadn’t been so close, Jack would have thought that he had imagined the words, because Gabe had been the only one who had never seemed to have any doubts about what they were doing, any fears about what the serum was doing to their bodies… but there was no mistaking the words, or the way Gabe’s grip had tightened. “You’re not allowed to die, Jack Morrison.” It was unmistakably an order and Jack bristled for a half a second, as though he wanted to die. However, the flicker of anger died a swift death when he felt lips brush against his forehead, colour that had nothing to do with the lingering traces of fever spreading across his cheeks. “You’re not allowed to leave me.”

 ****

    That night had marked a shift in their relationship. It was nothing overt. They still had a job to do, an exhausting regime of training and treatments, of days, spent feeling like they were going to die and days where it began to feel as though maybe they would survive, amazed by the evidence that they’re were growing stronger. Changing. Adapting. They still fought for top place in their training, neither of them able to hold the spot for long although no one else came close to deposing them from their ranking, and they still bickered and sparred, Jack ending up with a bloody nose when Gabe had underestimated his own strength, and Jack had been a hair too slow with his ducking.

   No, it had been in the quiet moments that the change was most visible. Sitting a little closer than necessary, although to the casual eye it wasn’t evident, fingers brushing under the table as they ate or when they sat pressed together on the rare nights off in the recreation room. Lingering gazes during examinations, bursts of worry when one of them took longer than normal or when another doctor would be called, waiting outside for the other to finish despite being ordered away. Fleeting kisses late at night before they headed to their separate rooms, and more rarely, quiet nights spent curled together on one bed. Those were usually the nights when the treatment had left them vulnerable, weakened, needing something or someone to hold onto. Or nights when someone else had disappeared, another name off the list, another reminder that they might not survive this.

   It had been one of those nights, Johnson one of the few left from the original cohort had been rushed to the infirmary the night before and hadn’t reappeared and whilst there had been no verbal confirmation of his death, it had been there in the tight expressions that had greeted their queries and the sight of an officer entering his room that afternoon with a box. No one had said anything, too used to it by now, but when bedtime had come Jack had been stood at Gabe’s door, waiting, the lost expression he could never hide around his partner reflected on Gabe’s face and neither of them had spoken, silently getting ready for bed and curling under the covers _. Don’t die on me_ , the words hung unspoken between them, evident in the way Jack rested his head over Gabe’s heart to listen to its soothing rhythm and in the way that Gabe clung to him, grip almost tight enough to bruise. _I won’t…_

   Jack had woken in the middle of the night, instantly alert, reaching for a weapon even though they had allowed them in their rooms, automatically scanning the room for a threat. It took him barely a second to realise he wasn’t in his own room, the memory of the previous night rushing back just as there was a breathy whimper from beside him and he knew even before he turned what he was going to find. It didn’t make it any easier to turn, reaching out blindly to hit the light, his heart leaping into his throat at the sight of Gabe twisted up beside him. Every inch of skin was covered in a sheen of sweat, and Jack knew even before he reached out with trembling fingers that he was burning up, but it was pain in his partner’s face, the agony that was drawing small, breathy whimpers from him that hurt the most and Jack had to swallow several times to get his voice to work.

“Gabe?” It was barely even a whisper, and he grimaced, disgusted with himself, and he took a deep breath, gathering himself before reluctantly moving his hand to Gabe’s shoulder and giving him a gentle but firm shake. “Gabe, can you wake up for me?” The only response he received was a louder gasp of pain, and terror began to rise beneath the panic, and he shook him again. “Gabe?” _Don’t do this to me_ … Refusing to let himself fall apart completely, remembering how Gabe had cared for him he forced himself out of bed, darting to the bathroom to get a cool cloth. He had barely got inside the room when he heard a series of thuds, immediately reversing course and coming to a halt as he realised that Gabriel was fitting, terror rising and falling over him in a crushing wave. “GABE!”

   Later he would have no recollection of calling for help, unable to recall anything but the way it had felt like an eternity for people to arrive. He had no memory of trailing helplessly after the medical team who had whisked Gabe away the moment he was stabilised, although he was vaguely aware of being ordered back to his own room, not caring that he had been caught out of bounds or that there was no mistaking the fact that he and Gabe were more than friends. None of that penetrated the haze that had settled over him the moment he had realised that this was more than a bad reaction, the moment it had dawned on him that Gabe might be about to break the promise between them. Gabe can’t die. He can’t die. He’s the one who’s supposed to survive this. He would never say it aloud, but Jack had always believed that Gabriel would survive SEP even before they had become involved…that if either of them was going to fail it would be him, and now he found himself clutching desperately at that thought. He has to pull through…

_Please…_

   He wasn’t sure who he was praying too, but that thought played over and over in his mind, hands clasped together as he waited. Not letting himself think about what he might be waiting for.

   It was only hours later when he was reluctantly allowed into the infirmary that the haze started to recede, and he missed the numbness when he was confronted with the sight of Gabe lying so still on the hospital bed, surrounded by an overwhelming number of machines and wires. Gabe was never that still. It had taken him a while to adapt to the way the other man moved in his sleep, waking every time he shifted the first couple of nights they had spent together and whilst he had got better, he was often aware of Gabe moving, arms tightening around him, nuzzling him, curling their legs together. That was how he was supposed to be, not still like this, only the laboured rise and fall of his chest proof that he was still here, that he was still there…but even that wasn’t as comforting as it should be, Jack’s gaze lingering on the oxygen mask covering Gabe’s face, doing little to hide the pain still darkening his features and he curled his hands into fists, nails biting into his palms to stop himself from breaking down at the sight. _Gabe._

   Several long minutes passed before he found the courage to move to Gabe’s side, sinking into the uncomfortable plastic chair that had been set out for him. It took him longer still to reach out and grasp Gabe’s hand, not caring that they were out in public because right now he needed the contact…but Gabe’s fingers were limp in his and too warm, the fever still blazing brightly, but he didn’t release him, instead gripping him as tightly as he dared.

“Come on Gabe,” he whispered, unable to bring himself to break the quiet of the infirmary even though they were on their own right now, wishing that he had the same soothing tone that his partner always used to call him back…that he had the words. Right now, everything was a mess in his mind, thoughts and words running around like quicksilver, too fast for him to cling to anything but the thought that Gabe couldn’t die…that he had to be the one that survived this. “Yyou’re the one who’s supposed to survive this.” He knew that if Gabe had been awake, he would have been lambasted for those words and part of him was waiting for him to wake up, to shout at him, to push him away. Anything would have been preferable to the unnerving stillness, but Gabe remained oblivious, and Jack bowed his head over their linked hands, blinking back the sting in his eyes.

_Please Gabe, don’t die on me._

**

    It seemed like his prayers had fallen on deaf ears. Time crawled by, Jack refusing to budge even though there was little he could do but sit there and hope and beg for Gabe to keep fighting, but Gabriel was deteriorating faster than the medical team could fight his symptoms, and Jack could see it in their faces every time they approached the bed. They were waiting for him to give up. To die. They didn’t say as much to him, but he could see it, and he could feel it closing in on him, his grip on Gabe’s hand bruising by this stage, as though his touch could do what they couldn’t…Stay with me. _You can’t leave me. You can’t die on me._ He had said it all, whispered it, screamed it and yet Gabe was slipping, and there was nothing he could do about it.

   He had known it was coming. Death had always been kept at a distance, as though the program worried that if they saw too much of it, then it would break them. Seemingly forgetting that they had all seen more death than most and ignoring the fact that once they had signed their paperwork, they were trapped, it was a neat net, and yet they maintained the ruse that they had some freedom. That they needed protecting. It was why he hadn’t been surprised two days later, hours after they had barely managed to bring Gabe back after he had crashed, that their commanding officers had appeared to order him away.

   On the outside, they painted it with pretty words. Telling him that he needed to rest, which he did, but he knew from napping that the moment he closed his eyes, he would see Gabe fitting or slipping away in front of him. Telling him they needed to do more tests, not realising that Jack had kept a tight note of the tests and observation intervals and that he detected the lie the moment it left their lips.

“No.”

   His quiet refusal, politely delivered complete with a salute as he had risen to meet the threat, was met with rapidly darkening expressions. “Gabriel isn’t dead yet, and until he dies I’m not going anywhere, and I’m not letting you ship him off somewhere.” It was a suspicion they all held, although until now it had remained unspoken. That as soon as someone showed signs they weren’t going to survive they were removed, to protect the program and its participants no doubt, and there was no way he was going to let that happen to Gabe. There was no way he was going to let the other man disappear and die in a strange place, no way he was going to let these people turn around and tell Gabe’s mother and sisters some fanciful tale. He wanted to believe it was because he knew that Gabe was going to survive, but that belief was wavering, and deep down he knew that he might be sentencing himself to sit and watch as Gabe slipped away on him. He didn’t care, he wasn’t going to move, and they must have seen that because the pretty words disappeared with a barked reminder of where he was and what he was.

“This is an order, Soldier.”

   There had been a time when those words would have had him jumping to obey. For all his naivety and idealism, he was still a Solider and a damn good one, and he had taken to the lifestyle like a duck to water, but right now he remained where he was, struggling not to tense, eyes darting around for any sign of a threat but unmoving in the face of their disapproval.

“I don’t care.” He could hear a bit of Gabe in his voice then, holding back a grimace. He could never match his partner’s sarcastic edge, but there was a bite that he usually lacked, and he could almost imagine the grin if Gabe had been awake to hear him. Either that or he would have been nudging him sharply with his elbow to shut him up - he ignored that thought, meeting their gazes with his own blank stare. _I’m not moving from his side_. He had never been more certain of anything in his life, and he knew that it must’ve shown in his face because he saw the moment they realised he wasn’t going to budge on the matter and the moment they decided to remind him of his place.

   Jack didn’t think about what he was doing, that he might well be throwing away his career…his future…his life. He didn’t care about any of that. All he could hear right then was the sound of Gabe’s ragged breathing, the beeping that meant the other man was still with him, and that was all that he cared about. Distantly he could hear the other man scolding him for being an idiot, reminding him of why he had been doing this in the first place, but he pushed it away, lips pulled back in a snarl as he took a step forward. “Gabriel Reyes isn’t going to die.” _He might_. Another step and he was gratified to see them hesitating, not blind to the changes he had undergone or the fact that he towered over both men. “And I won’t let you give up on him.” _What am I doing?_ It felt a death knell in the back of his head, but he ignored it and took another step forward. “So, you can let me stay, or you can leave.” _I know you won’t,_ he was moving before they had even had a chance to reply, catching the tensing of muscles and reacting, faster and stronger than they could hope to be.

   It was only minutes later when he slammed the doors to the infirmary shut, barricading it as best he could, hands trembling and the bruises and cuts that they had managed to land during the struggle beginning to sting that it dawned on him what he had done. He took a shuddering breath, leaning his head against the door and listening to the commotion beyond. He had caught them by surprise, they had never expected him to lash out like that and had been unprepared. Next time they would be ready, and all the speed and strength in the world would not be enough to hold them at bay. It wouldn’t stop him from trying he promised under his breath, stilling for a moment as it dawned on him even through the shock of what he had just done, that he didn’t regret it - that he wasn’t going to change his mind, and slowly he backed away from the door and turned to look at Gabriel.

   The other man was oblivious to what was going on, still hovering between life and death, closer to the latter than Jack wanted to acknowledge - but still here. And it was that which Jack clung to as he staggered back across the room to his bedside, sinking into the chair that had become his home the last few days and burying his head in his hands, startling himself with the chuckle that bubbled up. He had really done that. Risked everything, and probably thrown everything away, just to be able to stay by Gabe’s side even if it meant just watching him slip away, the chuckle dying away into a sob as he realised for the first time just how far he was willing to go to protect Gabriel Reyes.


	2. Part 1: Intro (Present)

   Reaper was cautious as he approached the still form of Soldier 76, sharp eyes watching for the slightest hint that the other man was faking it, his fingers remaining close to the triggers of his weapons although he had no intention of causing any more damage to the other man if he could avoid it. However, he had been caught out by the other man playing dead a few months ago during their last encounter, and he wasn’t about to fall for the same trick again. As last time the mistake had left him laid up for over a week as it turned out that his nanites were vulnerable to the helix rockets the Solider liked to use. His shoulder ached at the memory, and he fought the urge to reach up and rub it. Instead, he reached out and nudged the other man with his foot, trying not to think about how many times he had imagined doing just this, only then he had always hoped that the Solider would be dead. Now though he’s leaning in, relieved to see the broad chest rising and falling albeit not as steadily as he might like, and the fact that there is no reaction to the nudge has him slowly lowering his guns before he lets them melt away.

   It’s another moment of careful observation before he dares to crouch down beside the Solider, eyes constantly searching for any hint of movement. It’s the first time in years that he’s been this close to him without wanting to kill him, and there is a dull ache in his chest at that thought. A pain that only grows as he studies the silvery hair, hesitantly reaching out to tug on a strand, remembering when that same hair had been soft and golden against his fingers. It’s a painful reminder of just how much has changed. How much time has been lost, or rather how much time he had wasted on a grudge that had been built on a world of lies. Releasing the silver strands, he turned his attention to the mask and visor currently hiding the Soldier’s face from view, noting that the left side was cracked from their earlier fight and for a moment he’s tempted to remove it and see what lies underneath.

   However, a larger part of him is terrified by the thought of what might be hidden beneath it, not ready to confront that reality when he’s still reeling from recent revelations and the fact that the other man is right there in front of him. Beyond that, he’s reluctant to take that step out here in the open, especially without the other man conscious and aware of what he’s doing. Still, he can’t help but trail his fingers over the surface, tracing the cracks from their most recent fight and feeling the scratches and dents that have been left from previous fights, frowning behind his mask. It’s evidence that it has been a long time since the equipment has been properly maintained and he can feel his form beginning to shift, falling apart at the edges only to be rebuilt instantly by his nanites, a low growl building in the back of his throat. _Just what have you been doing to yourself?_ He’s not sure that he wants the answer.

**_‘Reaper? Where are you? We have company.’_ **

   He was dragged out of his thoughts by the communicator in his ear buzzing angrily to life, and he growled at it, wrenching his hand away from the other man and glancing up as he became aware of the dull roar of a plane engine somewhere too close for comfort. The way Widowmaker had snarled ‘Company’ was enough to tell him that it was the reformed Overwatch who had arrived, once again poking their noses in where they weren’t wanted, and he’s torn between the urge to groan at having his plans interrupted and being impressed that they had tracked them down so quickly. Winston must’ve upgraded Athena if they’re able to detect Sombra’s hacking this swiftly, and he files that thought away for later, after it might prove useful in his own hunt, but right now he has other things to focus on and his gaze darts back to his prize before he reaches for the communicator again.

“Retreat. Sombra already has the data we came for.” Data that might not be of any value after this, but he’s not about to voice that thought aloud. Handing it over will keep Talon happy for a while, and it’s a suitable diversion for Sombra and Widowmaker, and right now he needs their attention anywhere but on him and the gamble…choice…he’s about to make.

**_‘And you?’_ **

“I’ll meet you back at base.” _Maybe_ , he adds to himself knowing that the next few hours will change everything, or maybe that’s just what he’s hoping for, and for a moment his throat tightens as he stares down at the unconscious soldier. His gaze lingers on the masked face, imagining what lies underneath - imagining seeing _him_ again, and he shifted from one foot to the other, struggling to sound like his normal self when he continues. “An old…friend has finally shown his face, and I want to take care of things personally.” He’s relieved that he’s had enough public encounters with Soldier 76 over the past few months for them to know what he means without him needing to elaborate. It’s the perfect lie and a painful truth. Words that had come so easily, so naturally just a few months ago, now tasted like ash in his mouth and he let his hands curl into fists at his side, clawed fingers digging in to try and keep him grounded. The air is clouded with mist now, his form threatening to disintegrate in response to his rising emotions and it takes all his focus to hold himself together enough to reply. “Just get the data back safely.”

**_‘Understood.’_ **

   He’s grateful for her complete lack of interest in his ‘personal matter’, heaving a sigh of relief as silence fell, his form slowly solidifying although little wisps of the dark mist continued to escape with each breath, the nanites fighting to adapt to emotional responses that he hadn’t allowed himself to feel in a long time. It’s only when he no longer feels in danger of disintegrating that he turns his attention fully back to his unconscious companion, relieved that he hadn’t been awake to see his near meltdown. For a moment, he just studies the Soldier, silently weighing up his options as he listens to the rising commotion in the distance. Idiots, a small part of him comments snidely, and part of him longs to go over there and teach them the meaning of stealth, especially when he hears the distinctive crack of McCree’s gun…the former Blackwatch agents at least should know better, he’d had it drilled into him often enough. However, there would be plenty of time to deal with that later, for now, his interest lay solely in Solider 76 and the conversation they needed to have.

_A conversation we should have had a long time ago…_

   It’s a familiar thought now, and he pushes it aside. He’d never had any intention of having that conversation here anyway, but with Overwatch crawling over the place it was definitely not an option anymore. There’s another spike of irritation, but he ignores it in favour of crouching down once more, hesitating for half a moment before gently gathering the unconscious man into his arms, trying not to focus on how easily the Soldier fits into his arms and how right it feels to be holding him again, fingers tightening against him.

“Time to go…Jack.”

****

_‘Strike-Commander Morrison made an announcement today regarding the rumours of a rogue organisation within Overwatch. Morrison who assumed the post nearly eighteen months ago was quick to assure us that all accusations were being thoroughly investigated and that he would personally be keeping the public updated on the inquiry. When pressed, he admitted that some actions that fell outside of Overwatch’s remit had been committed and that he would take full responsibility for that if it were deemed necessary by the inquiry and the U.N.’_

  Gabriel tapped his fingers on the table as he watched the holovid, eyes focused intently on the figure of Jack Morrison standing in front of the crowd, the distinctive blue uniform making him stand out. It had looked like any other press conference. Overwatch’s golden boy soothing the public with a pretty smile and prettier words, and at the time that was all he had seen, hiding in the back and seething at the fact that the U.N. and Jack were interfering in Blackwatch when it had been the hone they had thrown him in the first place. Now though he could see the man standing a little too close to Jack for comfort and the strained edge to Jack’s smile as he threw out platitude after platitude _. I should have noticed_ , it was a thought that had been haunting him ever since he had got a little closer to the truth. His whole existence back then had been built on stealth and observation, he had seen everything else and yet he hadn’t been able to see what was right in front of his eyes, or rather he hadn’t wanted to, and that was inexcusable.

   His form was shifting again, not helped by the fact that he had cast aside the Reaper persona the moment he had reached safety, letting his emotions run more freely and he could feel them rising as he stared at the screen for a moment longer. Growling under his breath, unable to bear Jack’s fake smile any longer, he reached out and turned the display off although he knew that it would stop the words replaying through his mind. He knew the speech off by heart, had heard all of Jack’s pretty words a hundred times or more and yet each word meant something different now, and he hated it. Hated the fact that his failures were written across dozens of holovids and even more reports that he had painstakingly retrieved from the very depths of his Overwatch files. _I failed…_ He can feel himself disintegrating, feet and legs already lost to the mist before he managed to wrench his gaze across to the still form in the bed, feeling something shifting in his chest, settling as he watched the steady rise and fall of his chest.

_I won’t fail again._

**

  Gabriel had taken to pacing backwards and forwards across the room, his gaze never straying from Jack for more than a couple of minutes. In the past, Jack would have bounced back from something like this, the stuff that had been pumped into them during their SEP years pushing them back to their feet long before most people would even have been waking, and yet Jack had yet to stir. Did it grow weaker with age? He hadn’t noticed a change, but then after what had been done to him perhaps that wasn’t surprising, but the thought of it happening to Jack. The idea that there might be something else threatening to get in the way, threatening to take the other man away from him leaving a foul taste in his mouth. And he found himself moving closer to the bed, as though his presence would be enough to stop that from happening and he wanted to curse himself for being so sentimental.

   He was about to turn away to continue his orbit when he paused, something catching his attention and his eyes narrowed as he studied Jack. The other man was still, but there was something off about the stillness, and he couldn’t stop his eyes from flicking to where he had put Jack’s weapons, but they were right where he had left them, and he refocused on Jack just in time to catch the slightest increase of tension in his shoulders. He fought back a snort…Jack had never been good at faking sleep, although the amusement that came with that thought was tinged with sadness because he could remember the long nights spent in their bed when he’d stared at those tense shoulders and known that Jack was awake too. Neither of them had said anything, and then it had been too late. He wasn’t going to make that mistake again, and he sighed, inching closer to the bed.

“I know that you’re awake, Jack.”

   There was no response, and he wondered if Jack was going to keep feigning sleep even though he had been caught and for a moment his lips quirked up. It was a relief to see a hint of the old Jack shining through, the stubborn idiot. The man who had stopped the SEP from giving up on him when his body had nearly failed him, but the amusement was short-lived because Jack sighed, a dusty crackle of sound before slowly he began to push himself up. Part of Gabriel was tempted to dart through and help him, catching the slight wobble in Jack’s arms, but he found himself unable to move, realising that the conversation was looming over them now and he bit down on his lip, using the pain to ground himself because he couldn’t afford to fall apart now. Not when Jack was slowly lifting his head, and Gabriel tensed, half wishing that he had kept his mask on for now, before frowning when he realised that the other man didn’t seem to be focusing on him. “Jack? Jack Morrison?” Had he done some real damage when he’d knocked him out? He’d had to be rougher than intended because even after everything Jack Morrison was a tough son of a bitch.

“Who are you? Where am I?” The voice was nothing like the one he remembered, nothing like the one in the holovids and in a way, that helped, it quietened the memories for a moment, and Gabriel took half a step forward, seeing the way Jack tilted his head as though listening to his movements. He was impressed, Blackwatch and living if you could call it that as a Wraith had made him virtually silent when he moved and yet it was clear that Jack had managed to lock onto where he was.

“I…” He hesitated, suddenly afraid to admit who he was. He had spent so long blaming Jack for everything that had happened, had Jack been doing the same? Had Jack spent all those years hating him for not being able to see what was happening right under his nose? He was a coward, he realised, and there was a bitter taste in his mouth as he settled for saying. “You’re safe.” The derisive snort that met his words made him bristle, but he didn’t speak, watching Jack considering his words, the masked head turning blindly for a moment before he sighed, fingers weaving together in his lap, an old nervous gesture and Gabriel blinked, remembering how Jack had done that nearly constantly those last few months before the fall. _Another sign I missed_. There was an apology on the tip of his tongue, but then Jack spoke again, gravelly voice soft…defeated… disappointed.

“Why didn’t you kill me?” He opened his mouth, realising that he needed to say something now, only to find himself silenced once more. “Reaper…” There was no hatred in the whisper, no anger and it was only now that they weren’t trying to kill each other that it dawned on Gabriel that there had never been any of those emotions in their encounters. Jack had fought him. Fought to survive, fought to stop him, but at the same time… _Jack, were you trying to get me to kill you? Were you trying to die?_

“Look at me,” he ordered, lurching forward.

“I can’t,” Jack muttered, although he lifted his head and this time Gabriel realised that the crimson light from the visor was missing and he growled. Part of him had suspected, watching how Jack used the visor to fight, but he had hoped…

“Your eyes?”

   Jack didn’t reply, hunching in on himself for a moment, just as he had when they were younger, and he was building himself up to tell Gabriel a lie. At least before everything had started to deteriorate and he had learned how to mask himself from everyone, even him. But then he seemed to crumple in defeat, a light tremor in his hands as he slowly lifted his arms, fumbling with the clasps of the mask and visor, a muttered curse slipping free before he managed to free it, letting it fall into his lap, before tilting his head upwards.

   _Jack._ Gabriel couldn’t speak, at this angle, there was no way he could escape the sight in front of his eyes, and it felt like all the air had just been forced from his lungs. Deep down he had known that there was no way that Jack could have got out of Zurich unscathed. There was no way anyone could have got out of that hellhole without damage, his mind flicking back to the casualty lists, the endless pages of familiar names of those injured and killed that day - the names he had blamed Jack for even before he had known that the other man had survived.

_“Get out of here,” Jack was pleading with him, desperation that Gabriel had never seen before written across his face, even though his hands were terrifyingly steady as he continued to work. There was a feverish light in the blue eyes that met his gaze. “I’m going to sound the alarm. No one else has to die. So, go and let me do this.”_

   Gabriel closed his eyes. _I did this…_ taking a shuddering breath he opened his eyes again, forcing himself to look at the ruined features, to take in the damage without looking away. It didn’t come close to what had been done to his body, but was there more? More damage hidden beneath Jack’s clothes? Hidden inside? It didn’t matter… the empty blue eyes, faded to the point where it was hard to even call them blue anymore, and the scars that marred pale skin were bad enough, and on top of his recent discoveries it was too much, and there was a burning sensation in his eyes, mist rising in clouds from his skin.

“Jack…”

   Jack jerked at his voice…at the sympathy…at the anguish and he frowned, reaching up to trail a trembling hand over the scars before he shook his head. “It is no more than I deserve.” The certainty in Jack’s voice cut Gabriel to the core. It echoed everything he had felt in the aftermath of Zurich, the fury he had felt, the blame that he had laid directly at Jack’s feet. It hurt to hear it now that he knew the truth, and it hurt a thousand times more to hear Jack saying it and he was moving before he realised what he was doing, settling awkwardly on the edge of the bed and reaching out to grasp Jack’s face, fingers gentle as he brushed against scarred flesh.

“You didn’t deserve this.” N _either of us was in the right, we both made mistakes, but you didn’t deserve this…._ There was so much he wanted to say, but the words wouldn’t come, his heart hammering in his chest as it dawned on him just how close they were…that he was touching Jack, his Jack and he nearly released him, guilt welling up as anguish flashed across Jack’s face.

“Yes, I do. I…”

“No!” Gabriel cut him off, unable to bear the thought of listening to him any longer, struggling to hold himself together. _No Jack. No..._ His form was wavering, nearly falling apart as Jack suddenly lurched back, anger leaking into his voice and expression as he shook his head wildly.

“What do you care? Who the hell are you?” Gabriel frowned, catching the waver in the other’s voice on the last word, the longing - the hope, that couldn’t quite be masked, and the way that Jack’s fingers twitched as though he was fighting the urge to reach out and his eyes widened. _He knows…_

“You already know.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Don’t lie to me,” Gabriel growled, cursing Jack for being so stubborn. Although he supposed he couldn’t really blame him after all, neither of them should have survived that day. He could see that Jack was wavering and that he only needed one more little push, and he leant forward, trying to ignore the shifting sensation under his skin as the nanites worked to hold him together, instead reaching out to grasp Jack’s hand and twining their fingers together. He had no right, not anymore and yet he couldn’t help but marvel at how easily they slid together, his own voice wavering this time. “Not anymore…Jackie.” The nickname felt foreign on his tongue after so many years and yet painfully like coming home, and he felt Jack tense for a moment before the other man crumpled completely, and he hastily shifted to catch him, drawing in a shuddering breath as he felt Jack clutching at his back.

“G-Gabe…?”

“Yeah. It’s me,” he murmured softly, unprepared for Jack’s emotions swinging in the other direction, the other man lurching out of his grip with a snarl that was more desperate than anger.

“Then why didn’t you kill me?!” Jack was shouting at him now, hands curled into fists at his side, expression twisted with self-loathing and Gabriel finds himself lost for words. His silence seems to make it worse though because Jack’s voice is cracking now and he’s shaking. “You had every reason! Every right.” He’s coming apart at the seams, and Gabriel has to stop it because he can’t watch Jack break now, not when he’s right in front of him. Not when they’re this close to the truth…and so he settles for the truth, deliberately keeping his voice as calm as possible, although the mist seeping out with each word betrays his real feelings and he’s glad that Jack can’t see it.

“I wanted to.” The quiet admission makes Jack go still, although the glimmer of something akin to hope makes Gabriel want to snarl at him. Instead, he continues as calmly as he can. “For the longest time that was all I thought about.”

_I’m going to kill him. I’m going to kill him._

_Jack Morrison was alive. Reaper’s body had disintegrated the moment he had realised who the vigilante he had been clashing with for months really was, anger that he hadn’t felt since the day he had woken to find himself like this erupting in his chest, too much for his nanites to bear. It had taken him days to rebuild himself. Widowmaker had brought him prey to eat, but he hadn’t even paid attention to the alluring souls that had been so close…instead, his thoughts had been fixated on the tattered, stained soul he had detected in Solider 76. In Jack. Focused on the fought of killing him and devouring, eradicating him completely this time…and making sure he knew who he was just before he died so that he would know who had killed him so that he would know he wasn’t forgiven._

“Then why…?” Jack’s quiet voice draws him back to the present, and he realises with a pang that he had shared that memory aloud and that Jack has just accepted it. There’s no fear in the ruined face, just calm acceptance and a hint of confusion. “Why not do it? I know who you are…I don’t blame you for not forgiving me. So why?”

“Damn it, Jack,” Gabriel snaps, and he takes comfort from the way Jack tenses. He’s not completely passive, which means there’s still a chance for him to get through to him and he takes a deep breath before reaching out for Jack’s hand again. Surprised when the other man lets him take it, although he has a feeling that Jack is just waiting for him to lash out and it takes him a moment to get his voice to work again. “Why didn’t you tell me the truth?”

“About what?”

“You,” Gabriel notes the cautious tone, the way that Jack has tensed, but he’s not backing down. Not when they’re finally talking, and so he continues, feeling Jack tensing with each word. “Blackwatch, Overwatch…Petras…you can take your pick.” He doesn’t miss the way that Jack flinches at Petras’ name, and he filed it away for later, remaining focused on Jack’s face and the way its twisted into a grimace, fear and anger warring for control before that cursed blank mask that Jack had mastered towards the end slides into place.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Don’t lie to me, Morrison.” It comes out more viciously than he intended, but there’s no way he’s going to let Jack hide from this. He needs the truth, they both do, and Jack is the only one that knows what really happens. Oh, Gabriel has clues and hunches - but it’s not enough. Still, he doesn’t like the fact that he had made Jack flinch, echoes of their old arguments coming back to haunt him. “Sorry, I just want…need…to know the truth now.” He had known that his demands were pushing Jack closer to the edge, but he hadn’t thought that the apology would be what pushed him over, caught by surprise when Jack a violent sob rocked the other man.

 “Don’t apologise to me!” Jack yanks his hand away from Gabriel, hunching in on himself, a bitter noise that’s halfway between a chuckle and another sob escaping as he sits there shaking his head violently from side to side, knuckles turning white as he clutches at his arms. “Y-You don’t…you don’t know what I did.” _I know, that’s why I’m pushing for answers…_ Gabriel almost wants to snap at him, but instead, he shifts into a more comfortable position on the edge of the bed, reaching out again, fingers brushing Jack’s knee as he makes his voice as gentle as he can.

“Then tell me.”


	3. Part 1: Chapter 1 (Past)

_‘…It was announced today that Jack Morrison will be leading the new Overwatch organisation that has replaced the Strikeforce that led our forces during the Omnic Crisis. Strike-Commander Morrison was one of the founding members of that strike force and has been a key figure in the development of Overwatch, that along with his military record makes…’_

   Jack groaned as the reporter began to list off his achievements, quickly moving across the room to turn the television off, wondering who on earth had decided that it was a good idea to have the blasted thing on ready for when he got to his office. He made a note to unplug the damn thing if it became a regular occurrence as he had no interest in seeing his own face plastered over the screen, before turning to survey the room. His office. He grimaced, spinning on his heel to take it all in. It was immaculate, all sleek lines and new furniture. The far wall was covered in maps and screens, currently bearing the Overwatch logo and the blinking blue light that showed that Athena was ready to serve, while the wall next to it was comprised entirely of windows which afforded him a magnificent view of the rest of the base and the mountains rising around them. At the other end was a large desk and an imposing looking chair that he knew that he would be spending far too many hours in, and a large pile of reports already waiting for his attention and he fought back a groan.

 _What am I doing here?_ It was a thought that had been plaguing him from the moment he had woken that morning, pulling on the bright blue of the Strike-Commander for the first time, the uniform still heavy and unwelcome against his shoulders. However, standing in the middle of this strange room made the question hit him anew, and he wished with everything that he had that he could just turn around and walk away. That he could go back to just being a soldier.

   That wasn’t an option though, at least not right now. The promotion that he had never wanted and had spent weeks actively fighting against had gone through, it was all official now, and as Gabriel had pointed out when the outcome had become obvious, he had to at least try… _Gabe_. That had been another reason that he had fought so hard against the promotion. In his mind, it should’ve gone to Gabriel, although his partner had been just as adamant that he didn’t want it, both agreeing that while they might have commanded during wartime, neither of them had the slightest clue how to be a bureaucrat. It had been more than that though. They were soldiers, and neither of them was ready to leave the field just yet, especially when there were still pockets of unrest left over from the Crisis, with new groups seemingly popping up all the time. There was still plenty of fighting to be done and plenty of fight left in them, after all, that was what they had been built for, what they had endured SEP for. And yet here they were…

   In the end, it had been the threat of having someone else take over, someone who hadn’t fought in the Crisis, who didn’t know what they’d done to make Overwatch a possibility that had swayed them. They didn’t want a stranger coming in and undermining everything they had built so far, and so they had capitulated, and yet as he glanced around the office, Jack couldn’t help but feel that he should have fought harder.

   Nervously he twisted his hands together, a nervous habit his father had always scolded him for, feeling the raised edge of the scar that ran down the back of his hand. It was an old scar now, pale and faded, a memento from the night that he had risked everything to stop the SEP from giving up on Gabriel and disposing of him. He tensed, nails digging into the pale mark. It hurt to be reminded of how hard he had fought back then, how easy it had been…

_“You bloody idiot.” Gabriel was there the moment he stepped into his room, yanking him hard and fast into a tight hug that threatened to cut off his air. Jack was about to protest, but as he found himself pressed against the other’s chest he realised just how badly Gabriel was trembling and speechless he found himself unable to do anything but return the hug. There were warm lips against his forehead, and he tilted his face up, seeking a proper kiss after the hell that had been his morning and Gabe indulged him briefly, before pushing him back so that he could scowl at him. “What the hell were you thinking?”_

_Jack hesitated for a moment, holding the burning gaze while contemplating how to answer without Gabe tearing him a new one. He hadn’t been thinking, not really - but he has a feeling that answer isn’t going to go down well right now, and he settles for shrugging. “I knew that you would survive.” Not quite a lie and quite the truth either, he had been hoping that Gabe would survive and back then that had been enough. Now, in the harsh light of day, he knew that he had been reckless and that if Gabe hadn’t been stubborn and pulled through despite the odds, then he would have ruined his career for nothing. The meeting that he’d just come from had been focused on hammering that fact home, and he knew that it was only the fact that his actions meant that they still had an extra SEP graduate and that both he and Gabe held the best results, was protecting him from them taking it any further. He had been warned that future incidents wouldn’t be taken so lightly, and he knew the words hadn’t been an empty threat, and yet he still couldn’t bring himself to regret his actions and that scared him more than he wanted to admit._

_“Jack…” Gabriel sounds torn between anger and resignation, and Jack has a feeling that his expression had probably betrayed him. Again…and he sighs, waiting for the recriminations and for Gabe to tear into him even though they both know it won’t change anything. Gabe would still be mad at him for taking such a risk, and he wasn’t about to regret it, especially not with Gabriel stood in front of him alive and well, a far cry from the man he had been so fiercely defending in the infirmary. “That isn’t…”_

_“Yes, it was,” Jack replied simply, knowing that Gabe had been about to tell him that wasn’t a good enough reason for his behaviour. He didn’t need the words, after all, he had heard it a dozen times since the other man had woken in the infirmary to find them both locked inside, and people hammering to get back inside. He sighed as he saw that the fire in Gabe’s eyes wasn’t abating and he took a step forward, reaching out to rest his palm over where he could feel the steady beat of his partner’s heart. “It doesn’t matter what you say, or what they say. I don’t regret it, and I would do it again in a heartbeat.”_

_“That’s what scares me,” Gabriel admitted, reaching up to grasp Jack’s hand, squeezing it lightly before bringing it up to his mouth and pressing a kiss to the palm. “I’m not worth that Jack.”_

_You are to me._

“You are to me,” Jack murmured, wishing that he had said the words aloud back then and that he had fought harder against the promotion. The words haunting him as he moved slowly across to the desk, refusing to look at the reports and instead sinking into the chair and burying his head in his hands. I shouldn’t be here. Hell, if they hadn’t been desperate for every success they could wring out of the program back then he wouldn’t be, and part of him wondered if he said something about that, if it would be enough to make them change their mind. Probably not. There was no way that incident hadn’t been recorded somewhere, which meant that the higher ups already knew about it…knew and still gave him the position.

   He growled under his breath at that thought, he had known from the start that there was more to the promotion and the fact that it had landed in his lap rather than Gabe’s. Oh, the words had been pretty enough. The reasons seemingly fair and his expression darkened as he remembered the meeting with Petras and the committee from the U. N.. The undertones that he hadn’t understood and now wished he’d questioned harder, if only because then maybe he wouldn’t be sat here with a job that he didn’t want and a feeling that this was only the start of something he wasn’t ready for.

   He sat like that for another few minutes, feeling a headache building behind his eyes and wishing that he could just hide away from everything for a while or go and shoot something down in the training ranges. However, given the reaction to his presence in the hallway he wasn’t about to venture out, and with a sigh, he slowly sat up and glanced down at the work that was already waiting for him. Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see the light flashing on the phone which indicated that he already had messages waiting for him, and he grimaced before reaching out to take the top file, his mood dropping further when he spied ‘Blackwatch’ written across the front of the file.

    That was another issue. Another concern he amended as it hadn’t been around long enough to be anything more, fingers tracing the insignia on top of the file, the same insignia on the uniform that he had watched Gabe slipping into that morning. Blackwatch. It was the U.N’s brainchild, and their solution to promoting him over Gabriel, arguing that it wasn’t a consolation prize but an essential development if Overwatch was to succeed in this new age. It didn’t feel like it, and he knew that whilst Gabriel had been dressing up his new role for the last few weeks, coming up with ideas and ways to use it that the U.N. would never have considered and already working on recruitment, he knew that he was far from happy at being shoehorned into the position. It might be necessary, in fact, they’d already had to send out some of Gabe’s handpicked agents on two separate missions where Overwatch’s presence would have caused more trouble than it was worth, but there were other people who could have run it…Gabe deserved better than being forced into the shadows.

_Into my shadow…_

   His headache was worse than ever, and he was no closer to reaching an answer to the current situation, but he pushed both things aside and forced himself to open the file and began to read, massaging his temple as he scanned the words with a scowl.

****

“Nice office.” The sudden voice broke into his thoughts, doing little to help his pounding head, but drawing his attention away from the pad that he’d been busy scrawling notes on for the last couple of hours. Seeing Gabe leaning on the doorway and grinning at him was one of the best things he had seen all day, and he managed a weary smile in return as he waved the other man in. Not missing the way that Gabe’s expression fell at the lacklustre welcome even as he stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. “Bigger than mine, although I think mine is more homely.” Jack chuckled slightly at that. He’d had a sneaky look at Gabe’s office the day before and seen that his partner had already commandeered some old, battered furniture to replace the needlessly immaculate furniture. He’d also gained a large houseplant from somewhere, and Jack knew that it wouldn’t be long before the surfaces were covered in odds and sods that Gabriel seemed to collect wherever he went. Gabe brightened a little at the chuckle, moving to lean on the side of the desk. “Still, not a bad room.”

“Yeah, for a Bureaucrat,” Jack made no effort to hide his bitterness, all traces of amusement disappearing as his previous thoughts came rushing back to him. He could put on a smile and a polite tone in public, but there was no way he was going to wear a mask in front of Gabe, no way he was going to hide things from him when there were already enough secrets around them.

“Jack…”

“Don’t.” Jack cut him off, knowing that the only thing Gabe was going say was reassurances that he could do this and that he didn’t blame him for the promotion, and while that was good to know, right now it was the last thing that he wanted to hear. “I know I promised to try, and I’m going to. It doesn’t mean that I have to like it though.” He grimaced, glancing around the office and longing for the old base and the shabby, cramped room that they had shared for months on end, the others always crowding in for meetings rather than using the main room. At the time, it had often felt too small, but now he longed for that closeness, that simplicity and he blinked, forcing his attention back to Gabe before he got too caught up in his thoughts. “And you can’t tell me you’re pleased about things either.”

“I…”

“Gabe,” Jack warned, hearing the start of the lie and knowing that Gabe was only lying to try and comfort him, scowling when the other man promptly offered him a placating smile before turning more serious when he realised that he wasn’t going to get away with it.

“Fine.” He was clearly reluctant to be honest, shifting from foot to foot before his shoulders fell slightly, his hand creeping up to touch the new insignia on his uniform and Jack didn’t miss the way Gabe’s eyes darted to the Overwatch insignia on his own uniform, the longing that couldn’t be masked. “It feels like they’ve just tossed me the scraps, but that’s on them Jack, not you.”

“But…”

“You fought this Jack, harder than I did and it didn’t do anything, and this isn’t like it was back in the SEP. You cause hell right now, and you won’t just get a slap on the wrist,” Gabriel pointed out, scowling when Jack fidgeted, clearly not ready to accept his words just yet and before Jack realised what was happening he had closed the distance between them, reaching down to grasp both of his hands, trapping them in place. His grip was firm, stopping Jack before he could even try and yank himself free, but the squeeze that followed was gentle, almost tender, as was the smile that tugged at his lips. “You don’t need to protect me this time.”

   _But I want to._ The words were there, but he didn’t say them, he didn’t need to. Gabriel’s expression was enough to tell him that he understood, and after a moment he sighed and nodded. He didn’t want to fight, not over this. “Fine…but if this doesn’t work out.” It was a warning and a promise, he had agreed to try although they hadn’t worked out how long they were going to let the ‘trial’ run, but he had no intention of staying in the position any longer than he had to.

“Sure thing Jackie.” Jack scowled at the nickname, but it was hard to be angry at the winning smile Gabe was giving him, and he melted when Gabriel lifted his hands to his lips and kissed them softly. “Now come and eat.” He blinked at that before glancing at the clock, startled to realise that it was well and truly past lunch time now and he coloured as he realised that he had lost track of time. It was something he had always been bad at, getting caught up in whatever he was doing and forgetting everything else and he’d lost count of the number of times that Gabe had come to drag him away from the training rooms during the SEP to make sure that he ate.

“Don’t you have work to do?” He asked even as he rose, knowing that Gabriel wouldn’t leave him alone now that he had proved that he hadn’t eaten yet.

“I’ve done my paperwork,” Gabriel was smug as he let his gaze flicker to the files still waiting to be dealt with on Jack’s desk. “I have some interviews in an hour, and I’m overseeing some training after that, but I have time to eat with you.”

“I hate you,” Jack grumbled as he glanced at the files with despair, wondering if he could get away with slipping away to ‘help’ with the training sessions. It had been weeks since he’d had a chance to properly spar with Gabriel, and it would be nice to regain some normality and to remind himself that he was still more than a bureaucrat.

“No, you don’t.” Gabriel pulled him in for a quick kiss before wrapping an arm around his shoulder and steering him towards the door. “Besides is that any way to speak to the idiot who was about to offer to come and help you with this mess tomorrow?” Jack paused then, unable to hide his hopeful expression, earning a warm chuckle and another playful kiss to the tip of his nose. “I’ll take that as a yes then.” There was so much that Jack wanted to say right then, relief and gratitude bubbling up, but the words wouldn’t come, and he settled for leaning into Gabe with a sigh.

   It was enough, it was always enough with Gabriel. He didn’t comment on the increased closeness, and he made no effort to move away even as they stepped out into the corridor, they had both been warned to keep things professional, but right now Jack felt like he might crumble if this was taken from him. They were well enough known by now that no one they passed batted an eyelid at the sight of them together, and it helped that after a few minutes of silence Gabriel began to talk. It was nothing serious, little snippets from his morning and the fact that Ana wanted them to have dinner with her at some point this week so they could plan for Fareeha’s birthday, but it was exactly what Jack needed, and by the time they reached the commissary he felt like he was back to being just Jack Morrison.

   Still, it felt like lunch was far too short, the feeling of peace fading a little as he realised that they were the focus of several awestruck gazes from new agents. He followed Gabriel’s example in ignoring them, startled to realise just how hungry he was, but at the back of his mind he was always thinking and planning. He didn’t want those gazes, which meant that he had to get to know them and he sighed as he imagined trying to fit that in as he thought about the diary of events, meetings and calls that he had been handed the day before. Still, it was something he knew at least, remembering the early days of the Strikeforce when they had all been new at working together and wary. The hours between fights spent getting to know one another in downtime and training, and he brightened again - it wasn’t the same as being in the field, but at least it was better than being stuck in that office all the time.

“You’re looking more cheerful.” He blinked, realising that he was smiling at least until it dawned on him that Gabriel was on his feet, tray already empty and ready to go back. His eyes darted across to the large clock on the opposite wall and grimaced, the brief respite was over, but before his mood could fail Gabriel was patting him on the shoulder, not quite daring to kiss him under all the watchful gazes. “I’ll see you later, and since it’s your first day, I’ll cook dinner.”

“It’s yours too,” Jack pointed out with a smile, always more than happy to enjoy his partner’s cooking and once again glad for the self-contained quarters they had been given, even though they had both promised to eat in public as often as possible. “I…”

“You’re in charge of dessert.” There was no missing the innuendo in those words, not with the wicked glint in Gabriel’s eyes and the smirk tugging at his lips and Jack could feel himself colouring, not helped by the warm chuckle that greeted his reaction. Years together and he was still caught off guard by Gabriel’s openness, and he ducked his head, wanting to hate the heat infusing his cheeks although Gabriel had admitted before that he found it endearing.

“Fine,” he managed to mutter at last, and Gabriel patted his shoulder again, fingers intentionally brushing the side of his neck before he disappeared. And by the time Jack had gathered himself enough to look up, Gabriel was already heading out of the door although not without flashing him one last grin, and despite the thought of having to get back to work, Jack found his lips quirking into a smile.

****

   Jack’s good mood lasted for most of the afternoon even as the time seemed to crawl by, the pile of folders taking forever to decrease in numbers and even when it finally reached a time when he could reasonably head back to his quarters there were still far too many needing to be dealt with. It didn’t stop him from rising though, because he had no intention of missing Gabriel’s cooking and an afternoon of tedium had given him time to plan their ‘dessert’, but he had barely taken two steps from the desk when his communicator. For half a minute, he considered just ignoring it, but the part of him that had agreed to this job and all that entailed was screaming at him to answer, and with a muffled curse he gave in, moving to answer it even as he glanced longingly at the clock.

He shouldn’t have answered it.

    Of all the people, he was going to be forced to deal with in his current position, and who he’d already had to spend far too much time with throughout the formation of Overwatch no one could put his back up like Petras. The man seemed to have made it his mission in life to make everything as complicated as possible, having played a key role in the restrictions that had been placed on Overwatch and Blackwatch, foolish barriers that were going to make it harder than necessary for them to do their jobs. He had also been the most inflexible when Jack had been trying to argue against his promotion, refusing to even consider Gabriel for the Strike Commander position. Something that made it hard for him to keep a civil tone, especially when Petras launched into a list of demands and complaints even though Jack hadn’t officially been in the job for more than a day.

   Still, he remembered his promise to Gabriel that he was going to try, and so he listened and made notes and hummed and hedged his responses, all the while his gaze was locked on the clock and the time that was slowly ticking onwards. At one point, there was a beep indicating that someone else was trying to call him and he had a feeling that it was Gabe, probably demanding to know where he was…probably angry, as the call went on and on, and after a few minutes it had rung off. He was distracted now, worrying about Gabe, about the job that seemed to be determined to come between them even though this was only the first day, and it was only when he heard Petras mention Gabriel’s name that his attention snapped back to the call.

“What about him?” He grimaced at the sharp concern he could hear in his own voice, he was going to have work on hiding his feelings better. It was something that Gabriel had warned him about in the past, but back then he had just been a Solider, it hadn’t mattered as long as he obeyed his orders. But now, he caught the pause at the other end of the call, and there was no missing the knowing edge to Petras’ voice as he launched into another list of complaints, this time aimed at the Blackwatch Commander and Jack found himself having to grit his teeth to hold back angry words.

_Gabriel, I’m not sure I can do this._

**

   It was well over an hour later that he finally reached their quarters, a headache pounding away solidly behind his eyes as he fumbled with the door, dreading the reaction he was going to get from his partner. “I’m so sorry,” the words were out of his mouth before he had even got the door to their quarters fully open, and he was caught by surprise when he found Gabriel waiting on the other side. He was waiting for the grumbling, the threats to never cook for him again and he didn’t want to know what his expression must have shown when Gabriel simply opened his arms in invitation. It wasn’t one he was going to ignore, taking two small steps and practically falling into his embrace, sighing with relief as he let his head fall against Gabriel’s shoulder. “I hate this job…”

“I know,” Gabriel murmured, drawing soothing patterns on Jack’s back even as he slowly began to guide them back into the living area, Jack following without complaint. “It’ll get better,” he promised as they reached the battered couch they had commandeered from the old base, one that still smelt of beer after their celebrations the day the Crisis had been declared over and sinking down onto it, pulling Jack down him.

   Jack moved then, shifting into a more comfortable position for both before promptly curling against Gabriel once more. He was vaguely aware of the delicious scent filling the air, but right now the thought of food had his stomach churning unpleasantly, the headache and stress making him groan as he hid his head against Gabriel once more. “Will it?” Normally he was the more optimistic of the two, something that had caused Gabriel to curse him more than once when everything was going to pieces around them, and Jack was still a ‘bloody ray of sunshine’, but right now he couldn’t muster the slightest bit of optimism. “It was Petras on the phone…” The sharp intake of breath told him that it was Gabriel who had been trying to call him, knowing that the other man tried to avoid Petras like the plague.

“And?"

“I hope that I never have to speak to him again.” It was a useless hope, the man had a direct line to him, and he was scheduled to be at the conference that Jack had to attend next week, and his fingers tightened in the material of Gabriel’s shirt at the thought of having to deal with Petras again. He hadn’t missed the subtle reminder that Blackwatch was still in a trial period…that Gabriel’s position was still fragile, that if he couldn’t prove himself and his unit were needed, then he would be gone, and he felt sick…because if anyone deserved that caveat it was him. “Gabe…”

“It’s going to work out,” Gabriel cut him off, and he sounded so confident that Jack wanted to believe him, and he couldn’t help but pull back to peer up at him.

“Promise?”

“I promise,” Gabriel said firmly. Using the same tone he had used to bolster their spirits in the field when everything was going to shit around them, and Jack couldn’t help but believe him. Although he didn’t loosen his grip on his partner, relieved when Gabriel made no attempt to make him, instead pulling him close once more and burying his lips in Jack’s hair. “Everything’s going to be okay Jack.”


End file.
